最搞笑的英语脑筋急转弯小故事
脑筋急转弯作为一种非正式的娱乐类语言形式,尽现了语言的机智、幽默和灵活性,随着创造性思维在今天的日益强化,这种智力游戏也越来越盛行。下面就是小编给大家带来的最搞笑的英语脑筋急转弯小故事,希望大家喜欢!
最搞笑的英语脑筋急转弯小故事一:
英语笑话故事:Shoulda Said
This guy walks into a bar with his golden retriever. "Hey, can I get a drink on the house if my dog talks for you?"
"Dogs can't talk, pal. But if you can prove to me yours does, I'll give you a drink. If not, I get to kick your ass."
"Okay," says the guy. He turns to his dog. "Okay fella. Tell me -- what is on top of your doghouse?"
"Roof!" The man turns and smiles at the bartender.
"THAT ain't talking! Any dog can bark!"
"Okay boy. Tell me -- how does sandpaper feel?"
"Ruff!"
"What the hell are you tryin' to pull, mister?"
"Okay, okay," says the man. "One more question please. Okay buddy, tell me -- who is the greatest ball player who ever lived?"
"Ruth."
The bartender beats the hell out of the guy and throws onto the sidewalk outside of the bar, then throws the dog out next to him. The dog stands up and looks at the guy.
"Geez. D'ya think I shoulda said DiMaggio?"
最搞笑的英语脑筋急转弯小故事二:
英语笑话故事:Be Careful for What You Wish for
A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell on the same day.
一对夫妇结婚已经25年了,正在一起庆祝他们的结婚纪念日和60岁生日。
During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a loving couple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.
正庆祝时,一位仙女从天而降说25年来他们一直相亲相爱,她将实现他们每个人一个愿望。
The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had the tickets in her hand.
妻子说想环游世界。仙女握住了她的手,只听轰的一声。妻子手中出现了各种入场券和票。
Next, it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I'd like to have a woman 30 years younger than me."
接着就该丈夫许愿了。他顿了一下,然后不好意思地说:“嗯,我想要一个比我年轻30岁的妻子。”
The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.
仙女拿起魔杖,只听轰的一声!丈夫变成90岁的老翁了。
最搞笑的英语脑筋急转弯小故事三:
英语笑话故事:Blind Date相亲(笑话)
After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grimexpression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died.""Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"
和相亲对象呆了一晚上后,男人再也受不了了。他事先安排了个朋友给他打电话,这样他就能借故先离开了。当他回到桌边,他垂下眼睛,装出一副阴沉的表情,说:“有个不幸的消息,我的祖父刚刚去世了。”“谢天谢地!”他的约会对象说,“如果你的祖父不死,我的祖父就得死了!”
最搞笑的英语脑筋急转弯小故事四:
英语笑话故事:Drink like a fish
A guy hosted a dinner party for people from work, including his boss.
All during the sit-down dinner, the host's three-year-old girl stared at her father's boss sitting across from her. The girl could hardly eat her food for staring.
The man checked his tie, felt his face for food, patted his hair in place, but nothing stopped her from staring at him. He tried his best to ignore her but, finally it was too much for him.
He asked her, "Why are you staring at me.?"
Everyone at the table had noticed her behaviour and the table went quiet for her response.
The little girl said, "My Daddy said you drink like a fish and I don't want to miss it!"
最搞笑的英语脑筋急转弯小故事五:
英语笑话故事:绝配
A wealthy matron is so proud of a valuable antique vase that she decides to have her bedroom painted the same color as the vase. Several painters try to match the shade, but none comes close enough to satisfy the eccentric woman.
Eventually, a painter approaches who is confident he can mix the proper color. The woman is pleased with the result, and the painter becomes famous.
Years later, he retires and turns the business over to his son."Dad, “says the son, there’s something I’ve got to know. How did you get those walls to match the vase so perfectly?"
"Son”, the father replies, I painted the vase."
一个富有的主妇很是骄傲因为她收藏了一件非常有价值的古董花瓶,于是她决定把卧室粉刷成与花瓶同样的颜色。许多油漆匠都试图尽力与花瓶的颜色匹配,但是没有任何人能做得 让那古怪的女人满意的。
一个油漆匠很自信他能做到,最终他成功了。那个主妇很满意,于是这个油漆匠也变得很出名。
多年以后,油漆匠要退休了,他把自己的生意交给儿子去经营。“爸爸”儿子问“我还有些事情想知道,你怎么能把墙粉刷得和花瓶的颜色那么相配?”“儿子”爸爸回答到“我只不过是把花瓶刷了。”
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