最新英语搞笑笑话大全
谨遵医嘱
Doctor's orders
Brown: I'm sorry to see you so unwell. Have you seen the doctor?
Jack: Yes. I'm having three baths a day.
Brown: What for?
Jack: Don't know, doctor's orders. He gave me some medicine and told me to follow the directions on the bottle, which read: "One tablespoonful to be taken three times a day in water."
情人节的梦
One night just before Valentine's Day a woman had a lovely dream about a beautiful necklace.
When she woke up, she told her husband, "I just dreamt that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day. What do you think it could mean?"
"You'll find out on Valentine's Day." he said with a knowing smile.
On Valentine's Day, the man gave his delighted wife a beautifully wrapped package.
Excitedly, she opened it, only to find a book entitled "The Meaning of Dreams".
半个还是十分之五
Teacher: Would you rather have one half of an orange or five tenths?
Gerald: I'd much rather have the half.
Teacher: Think carefully, and tell me why.
Gerald: Because you lose too much juice when you cut the orange into five tenths.
聪明的儿子
One day, the father lets eight-year-old son send a letter. The son took the letter. The father then remembered he didn't write address and addressee's name on the envelope.
After the son comes back, the father asks him: "You have thrown the letter into the mail box?"
"Certainly."
"You didn't notice that the envelope does not have address and addressee's name on it?"
"I certainly saw nothing written on the envelope."
"Then why didn't you take it back?"
"I thought that you did not write address and addressee, because you wouldn't let me know to whom you send the letter!"
什么也没留下
Mrs. Brown was going out for the day. She locked the house and tacked a note for the milkman on the door: "NOBODY HOME. DON'T LEAVE ANYTHING."
When she got back that night, she found her door broken open and her house ransacked. On the note she had left, she found the following message added:
"THANKS! WE HAVEN'T LEFT ANYTHING!"
布朗太太要外出一天。她锁好了房门,在门上给送牛奶的人钉了一张便条:“家里没人,请不要留下任何东西!”
她当天晚上回家后发现房间门被撞开,房子被洗劫一空。在她留给送奶人的便条上,她发现被补充了一句:“谢谢!我们什么也没留下!”
-
中学英语笑话故事阅读
一个合时宜的笑话可以让下属觉得管理人员亲切,不是高高在上的感觉。小编精心收集了中学英语笑话故事,供大家欣赏学习!中学英语笑话故事:奶奶再次举行婚礼"Soyouwantanotherdayoff,snortedtheteachertohisstudent,Tom.这么说,你又要请一天假,老师怒气冲冲地对他的学生...
-
真正好笑的英文笑话阅读
笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事类型,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。但长期以来它却一直被学界视为不登大雅之堂的小众,致使研究成果相对薄弱。小编精心收集了真正好笑的英文笑话,供大家欣赏学习!真正好笑的英文笑话:ShortFatherChristmasWhatdoyougetifyoucross...
-
关于爆笑英语笑话系列
互联网不仅是我们生活中不可缺少的,而且也是我们工作学习之余缓解压力、舒缓情绪的重要渠道。正是由于我们有这样的需要,网络笑话得以繁荣兴盛。本站小编分享关于爆笑英语笑话,希望可以帮助大家!关于爆笑英语笑话:IfIWasn'tRichARicholdman,whoinheritedallhis...
-
经典爆笑简单英语笑话
冷笑话是近几年新兴的一种语言现象,它轻松诙谐、别具一格,给我们紧张的生活增添了几分轻松的情趣,它一出现便受到了大多数人的喜爱。小编精心收集了经典爆笑简单英语笑话,供大家欣赏学习!经典爆笑简单英语笑话:WishingWellAcoupleistakingastrollinalovelymeadow...